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Five years later...

I've been a widow for five and a half years now. I was remembering how my husband used to sit on the outside steps and wait for me to come home. I wish I could talk to him again and tell him how much I love him still. You really don't know what you have til it's gone..  


 Hi. I haven't written here in a long time. I've kept a journal off and on for 32 years...but it is just for me. It was for remembering things that happened and writing things the kids could read later. I recorded what was happening in everyday life and what day flowers bloomed and I  recorded the birds I spotted. I wrote a lot when Dwayne was laid off and looking for a job in the early 80's. I wrote a lot when my dad died almost 5 years ago. Usually I write to get feeling out so I can think of something else and sleep.I wrote when I had cancer in livejournal..7 years ago.That's when I started my account. Now I feel so lost without my husband I'm back to write again. When I think of him it's lots of old memories that come up. I can't believe that the young ,strong husband of my past is gone. It doesn't seem possible. It's hard to walk alone when you've walked beside someone for 35 years. 

34th wedding anniversary

 Today would be our anniversary.
I miss my baby.

Writer's Block: Wardrobe Malfunction

Broken zippers, split seams, straps that come untied at the most embarrassing moment possible—what's your most memorable experience with an unexpected wardrobe malfunction?
When my son was a year old I took him to the doctor's office. He was sitting on my lap and pulled the front of my tube top sundress down to my waist. Of course I was'nt wearing a bra...and a full waiting room was my witness.
It was really quiet in there....highly embarrassing!


I went to the oral surgeon today and had 3 teeth pulled...all in the back.
I'm in pain now but had an interesting experience during surgery.
I woke up during the surgery and was hallucinating.
I told the doctor and nurses we were in space.There were lots of colors swirling around us. I was laying down and was in surgery...but they were weightless and floated over me. I saw Sean Connery and felt like I was in"'Zardoz.".But I couldn't say 'Zardoz" because of all the gauze in my mouth.I fell back to sleep. When I talked to the doctor later he said people have hallucinations but don't wake up and talk about them during surgery.  He said I was very entertaining and made his day. I told him the same and thanked him  for the trip to space.

Writer's Block: Love This Artist

Who is your favorite artist?

<input ... > View other answers


Today I worked on my painting of a sycamore tree. Trees are fun to paint...the bark and all that.  I want to get giclee prints made of this one and an Indian one I did.

I was doing portraits...but not really enjoying it..so I'm painting things I want now.

Part of the fun of painting for me is the research.
I even want to plant a sycamore tree next year.
They're very long-lived.

Architecture is also fun to paint..especially incorporated with nature.

Painting is just good plain fun...
Friday Five swipered from rachel, posted on sunday:

What was...

1. ...your first grade teacher's name?

Mrs. Elston, she encouraged me to read and was a very sweet lady.

2. ...your favorite Saturday morning cartoon?


3. ...the name of your very first best friend?
robin johnson, friend since we were six, still friends. Have lunch with her this week, in fact.

4. ...your favorite breakfast cereal?

Life Cereal

5. ...your favorite thing to do after school?
watch tv (dark shadows!). climb trees. play foursquare and basketball.

Dec. 17th, 2003

Joanna arrived safely in U.S....Happy to see her!